Our Daughter

The phone was ringing. I picked it up at exactly 12:54 p.m. I saw that it was Holt International, our agency. I immediately swallowed real hard and tried to gather myself enough to answer calmly (and anyone who knows me knows that calm does not come easy). Knowing that the shared list had come out the night before, I was quite certain that they were calling to tell me that they had a picture of our daughter. “Hello…” I said. “This is Beth with Holt,” said the voice on the other end of the phone. “Do you know why I am calling?” Not wanting to seem overly confident, I said “I think so.” Beth continued, “We have a beautiful baby girl for you,” I was shaking. I was laughing. I was crying. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I couldn’t believe the sudden rush of emotions I was feeling all within about 30 seconds.

With the tears now flowing on full-blast, I said, “What is her name?” “Lu XXXX XX,” Beth said. “She is very young. Her birthday was in January 2013.” Oh my goodness! A little tiny baby. I had a feeling we would be bringing home a two year old. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I couldn’t wait to get off the phone to call Daniel. I told her I definitely wanted her file, and she assured me that it would be in my inbox shortly. Beth told us we were so lucky to have such a beautiful little girl with such a clean file. I thanked her many times. I told her that I thought she must have the best job on the planet to get to make these referral calls. She assured me that this was the fun part and that the rest wasn’t quite as glamorous.

I immediately got off the phone with Beth. I called Daniel and didn’t get his cell. I then tried his office. When I got him, I said, “We have our little girl.” He was like, “What?” I said, “We have our little girl!!!!” “I’m coming home right now!” he said.

He arrived home about 25 minutes later. We got in front of the computer and pulled up my email. There was no email. We waited a few minutes and tried again. Still nothing. Ugggggh!! I couldn’t wait much longer to see her face! We tried to stay busy for another 30 minutes folding laundry, and suddenly I saw that it had come in on my cell phone.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!!!! We put Ben down for his nap. We asked Sydney to go to her room so that we could be alone together when we saw her face for the first time. We opened the page. The first tiny little picture was on the top right hand of the screen. A little tiny one-inch picture surrounded by lots of Chinese writing. Daniel puts his hand over his mouth and says, “She’s beautiful.” I began crying and saying, “Scroll down! Scroll down! Scroll down!” I wanted to see more pictures. Sure enough at the bottom of the screen were two precious pictures.

The first picture was of her in a little white and blue walker outside on a sidewalk. Her toes barely reached the ground. Her hands were grabbing the little toys on top of the walker. The second picture was of her tiny little self sitting in a pink lawn  chair. It looks like to us that she is wearing “Pleasant Goat” pajamas – a very popular cartoon in China. She looked like she could barely sit there without falling over or falling through the holes on the back of the lawn chair. We think the pictures were taken when she was around 5-6 months old. Tiny little hands. Tiny little feet. Her hair looked like it either hadn’t grown much or has been shaved by the orphanage, which is very common in China to help prevent the spread of lice. Perfect little eyes, tiny round lips and adorable ears…we are head over heels in love!

We both were sobbing at this point. It was truly one of the most emotional, amazing moments of my life. I don’t exactly have the right words to describe my feelings, but it was almost surreal. We kept saying to each other, “This just doesn’t feel real does it?”

After we had a few minutes to look at her alone, we invited Sydney to come see what all of the commotion was about. Sydney just smiled real big. I think it was a shock to her too. We had been talking about this little invisible person for such a long, long time and now suddenly we are staring right at her. All of the prayers we had prayed had been answered in such a beautiful way.

Now, I have had several days to look at her picture. Each time I see her, I am just filled with awe that God has given us such an incredible blessing. Adoption comes with pain. Every single person knows that, but what is beautiful for me and Daniel is that we get to be a part of this little girl’s story. We get to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. We get to be a part of something that we could never do on our own. She won’t be an orphan much longer. She will become our Eliza. I can’t wait for that day. I can’t fix all of the pain she may feel one day, but I can be there every second. She doesn’t have to go through it alone.

God is the healer. He is the great physician. He is the Alpha and Omega. He has the final say regarding her value, her worth and her beauty. He says she is worth more than rubies. He says that she was knit together in her mother’s womb. He says she has a purpose. He says that her life is valuable. He says that she matters. He says that she is worth the sacrifice of Jesus his own son. He says that she is loved. He says that He knows every single hair on her head.

In her pictures, she looks like she is eating well. It appears that she is being well cared for. This is such a huge blessing and an answer to prayer. From her paperwork, it also looks like she has a foster mother and probably goes home with her in the evenings. I am so thankful that there is someone loving her and taking care of her.

We continue to just thank you for your love and support of our family.


3 thoughts on “Our Daughter

  1. Oh Jenna, I am so so so excited for you!!! This is such a profound moment that will stick in your memory…”remember when we got the call!!” Congrats on your amazing news! I’ll be praying for God to grant you and Daniel peace during this next phase, as it’s heart-wrenching at times to have to wait on God’s timing to go to her. But oh how God is faithful!!

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